I've been watching a lot of movies for the past couple of weeks. I was doing good with watching less movies and staying active, until about 2 weeks ago when I apparently irritated my lower back again. Dr.'s orders included taking a steroid regimen pack, pain killers, and muscle relaxers, and also lots of rest. And let's not forget a hot pad. Boy oh boy do I love hot pads. Because of this forced relaxation and loss of activity, I have been watching a lot of movies at my place. I've also been in a bit of a quandary recently in regards to my thoughts and emotions. My thoughts have been all over the place, and well, my emotions, I'm just not used to having them I suppose. :p
Rather than try and explain my emotions over the last couple of weeks, here is a list of the movies that I've chosen to watch, in no particular order. Some several times. Don't judge me.
Lars & The Real Girl
One Week
Amelie
500 Days of Summer
Crazy Stupid Love
Unforgiven
Lawless
Skyfall
Feris Bueller's Day Off
Couples Retreat
The Guardian
True Grit
White Irish Drinkers
A Night At the Roxbury
Failure To Launch
Raising Arizona
The Flowers of War
Safety Not Guaranteed
Also, so far dating has been kind of a headache. I've met some really nice girls, and I've met a few slutty girls. All in all so far, it is kind of exhausting. With online dating, you sort of have to cast out a really big net, so to speak and then hope for the best. Some days I'll end up talking to a whole bunch of girls, and some days perhaps one or two. Some that I feel like I connect with on some levels, but then there just isn't a spark or any real chemistry there in person. I find myself comparing most of these girls to a certain someone, and they just don't seem to measure up.
Unfortunately, that certain someone isn't available and I can't exactly wait around and hope for the best either. It's time to be realistic and make myself get out there. I keep hoping that perhaps I'll just meet someone who will be great on a whole new level and that will make me forget. Help me forget. Whichever way you want to look at it. It sucks to be so completely enamored by someone and not have it reciprocated. I think that everybody ends up loving someone at some point of their life that is just not the right person. Or perhaps just not the right time. I'd like to think that I'm worth wanting on some levels, even though I am far from perfect. I have a lot to offer, and feel like I am finally ready to move on with my life. I am ready to find someone again. I am ready to be loved and love in return. Hopefully she's still out there, and maybe, just maybe, there is a chance she is looking too.
Monday, March 18, 2013
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
To date or learn French?
So. Dating is ridiculous. People are so pretentious. I recently decided to sign up on a plethora of online dating sights to give that a try. Never done it before, and I finally just figured, "Meh. How bad could it possibly be?" People are so connected now, and I've heard of so many people making real and lasting connections from meeting online now. Seriously, how bad could it possibly be?
First off, most sights out there are not free. I would imagine that you are more likely to find quality people using a paid site. Kinda makes sense, right? You know what I think about paying for an online dating site?
I'm not a total cheapskate, but I don't think I'm willing to pay these ridiculous prices to see a picture and have the right to message them directly. Only a handful of these sites will actually let you communicate with each other for free, and are pretty limited to how much communication they will allow too. All of that aside, however, and I am not too terribly impressed thus far.
Nearly every single profile I have read about every girl around here says about the same thing. Here is a quick synopsis in case you were wondering....
"I am fun and love the outdoors.......blah blah blah. I love to hike....I'm fun, I love to laugh, and stay active...blah blah blah. I like to go out, but I also like to snuggle up on the couch and watch movies. I'm spontaneous. I love good food. etc."
It is rare to find a genuine profile that actually tells me something real about any of these girls. Who doesn't like to have fun and laugh? Who doesn't love the outdoors around here? Apparently if I went into the mountains, I would also find every single girl there, and she would be hiking. And she would be loving it.
Let's talk about looks. Why is it that nearly every girl I am seeing that is my age, looks to me more like they are in their 40's? A lot of these women just look so old to me! That sounds so mean, but it's true. I don't feel old, and I definitely don't think that I look that old either. Why do these women look so aged? This means I am typically looking at girls anywhere from 24-36. Those seemed like good enough numbers for me. Looks aren't everything, but obviously it is important to be attracted to your partner. In my opinion, there is either chemistry or there isn't. I may not be a male stripper/model, but I don't think I'm Frankenstein either. If I message you, a return message is nice and polite I suppose, but you're either interested or you're not. Let's not waste each others time. On the other hand, I was under the impression that the point of a dating site was to date. How many people are great at advertising and marketing? Online dating is all about selling yourself. Am I interesting and attractive enough that you can't pass me up? Personally, I think I am much more interesting in person. I don't care much for texting either, as it is difficult to show sarcasm, humor, and inflection in text. I probably come across more as a big giant jerk while in fact, I probably think I am hilarious.
Next topic, communication. Are there some special rules about protocol for responding back to someone? If so, somebody let me know so I can be on board. Personally, I think it's a bit rude to just suddenly stop talking to someone and leave them hanging. I'm a grown man, and I appreciate honesty, and direct communication. Guys are just like that I think. Spell it out for us, otherwise, we make assumptions. On the other hand, let's try to have some tact people. Do you really think that your first communication to me should be asking me why I didn't go on a mission??? I don't know, maybe it should be and I just shouldn't be offended by that.
This brings me to my next point. I am not perfect. I have a little bit of baggage, so to speak. I am divorced. I have a kid. I'm going to be 32 this year. I'm not a GQ model, though I do think I could have made some serious money if I would have just let that dude take the pictures of me wearing The Leatherman. Oh well. I also did not go on a mission......GASP! Shocking, I know. Mostly, I believe that I am not in the right dating pool.
Let me also stress that I am not looking for perfect either. I don't want to marry the next girl I go out on a date with. I want to have fun. I want to get to know new people, and try some new things. That isn't code for sleep around and hook up. I understand that probably isn't the norm for most guys either, but that's where I am in life. I want to be happy. I'm ready for love. I'm ready for the real thing, and I'm ready to meet the right person, whoever that may be. Someone who will love me and appreciate me for who I am, and push me to be better. The list goes on of course, because I have a pretty good idea at this point of what I'm looking for. At the same time though, I want to be surprised. I want to find the right person for me, even if she doesn't fit the mold I am used to. Hopefully that makes sense to anyone that might be reading this.
I am old fashioned in a lot of ways, but it is nice to be chased sometimes too. Don't leave me guessing as to whether or not you are actually interested. If I have to guess, then I will probably assume "no" is the answer.
You know what else is awesome? When I've met a girl already that I think is about as close to "my perfect" as I can imagine, but I know I can't have her. Already taken. I find myself comparing a lot of girls to her, and they don't really measure up. Do most people do that, or am I the only one?
Online dating is full of awkward disappointments. Seeing that someone has "viewed your profile" but didn't find you interesting enough to message you, and that sort of thing. Much different than real life or what I've experienced thus far. Part of me wants to keep on looking, and keep hoping that something unexpected will happen. The other part of me just wants to forget it and just work on learning French instead.
Que faire? Que faire?
First off, most sights out there are not free. I would imagine that you are more likely to find quality people using a paid site. Kinda makes sense, right? You know what I think about paying for an online dating site?
I'm not a total cheapskate, but I don't think I'm willing to pay these ridiculous prices to see a picture and have the right to message them directly. Only a handful of these sites will actually let you communicate with each other for free, and are pretty limited to how much communication they will allow too. All of that aside, however, and I am not too terribly impressed thus far.
Nearly every single profile I have read about every girl around here says about the same thing. Here is a quick synopsis in case you were wondering....
"I am fun and love the outdoors.......blah blah blah. I love to hike....I'm fun, I love to laugh, and stay active...blah blah blah. I like to go out, but I also like to snuggle up on the couch and watch movies. I'm spontaneous. I love good food. etc."
It is rare to find a genuine profile that actually tells me something real about any of these girls. Who doesn't like to have fun and laugh? Who doesn't love the outdoors around here? Apparently if I went into the mountains, I would also find every single girl there, and she would be hiking. And she would be loving it.
Let's talk about looks. Why is it that nearly every girl I am seeing that is my age, looks to me more like they are in their 40's? A lot of these women just look so old to me! That sounds so mean, but it's true. I don't feel old, and I definitely don't think that I look that old either. Why do these women look so aged? This means I am typically looking at girls anywhere from 24-36. Those seemed like good enough numbers for me. Looks aren't everything, but obviously it is important to be attracted to your partner. In my opinion, there is either chemistry or there isn't. I may not be a male stripper/model, but I don't think I'm Frankenstein either. If I message you, a return message is nice and polite I suppose, but you're either interested or you're not. Let's not waste each others time. On the other hand, I was under the impression that the point of a dating site was to date. How many people are great at advertising and marketing? Online dating is all about selling yourself. Am I interesting and attractive enough that you can't pass me up? Personally, I think I am much more interesting in person. I don't care much for texting either, as it is difficult to show sarcasm, humor, and inflection in text. I probably come across more as a big giant jerk while in fact, I probably think I am hilarious.
Next topic, communication. Are there some special rules about protocol for responding back to someone? If so, somebody let me know so I can be on board. Personally, I think it's a bit rude to just suddenly stop talking to someone and leave them hanging. I'm a grown man, and I appreciate honesty, and direct communication. Guys are just like that I think. Spell it out for us, otherwise, we make assumptions. On the other hand, let's try to have some tact people. Do you really think that your first communication to me should be asking me why I didn't go on a mission??? I don't know, maybe it should be and I just shouldn't be offended by that.
This brings me to my next point. I am not perfect. I have a little bit of baggage, so to speak. I am divorced. I have a kid. I'm going to be 32 this year. I'm not a GQ model, though I do think I could have made some serious money if I would have just let that dude take the pictures of me wearing The Leatherman. Oh well. I also did not go on a mission......GASP! Shocking, I know. Mostly, I believe that I am not in the right dating pool.
Let me also stress that I am not looking for perfect either. I don't want to marry the next girl I go out on a date with. I want to have fun. I want to get to know new people, and try some new things. That isn't code for sleep around and hook up. I understand that probably isn't the norm for most guys either, but that's where I am in life. I want to be happy. I'm ready for love. I'm ready for the real thing, and I'm ready to meet the right person, whoever that may be. Someone who will love me and appreciate me for who I am, and push me to be better. The list goes on of course, because I have a pretty good idea at this point of what I'm looking for. At the same time though, I want to be surprised. I want to find the right person for me, even if she doesn't fit the mold I am used to. Hopefully that makes sense to anyone that might be reading this.
I am old fashioned in a lot of ways, but it is nice to be chased sometimes too. Don't leave me guessing as to whether or not you are actually interested. If I have to guess, then I will probably assume "no" is the answer.
You know what else is awesome? When I've met a girl already that I think is about as close to "my perfect" as I can imagine, but I know I can't have her. Already taken. I find myself comparing a lot of girls to her, and they don't really measure up. Do most people do that, or am I the only one?
Online dating is full of awkward disappointments. Seeing that someone has "viewed your profile" but didn't find you interesting enough to message you, and that sort of thing. Much different than real life or what I've experienced thus far. Part of me wants to keep on looking, and keep hoping that something unexpected will happen. The other part of me just wants to forget it and just work on learning French instead.
Que faire? Que faire?
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