So today I was reminded of a particular incident that occurred when I was living in Long Beach. I was barely 18 years old at the time. I had just graduated from High School, and took off to live with my older brother Tony down in Long Beach. I had been given a small scholarship to the Musicians Institute in Hollywood, California, and wanted to pursue my dreams of becoming a studio musician.
It was a pretty quick decision, and being 18, I also did not read the full terms of said scholarship. After arriving, I spent about 2 weeks sinking into the reality that is "The Ghetto" otherwise known as 7th St and Cherry. I needed a job. My brother was nice enough to introduce me to the excitement of temp work. My first assignment was doing basic accounting work at a California Insurance office nearby, and away I went for the first couple of weeks. This is where my story begins.
I had became friends with a pregnant woman, whose name escapes me now, while working at the Insurance Office. We ended up becoming lunch buddies, meaning that we went to lunch together for mutual benefit and company. She benefited by not being alone at lunch while she was out and about in her very pregnant state. I benefited by not being alone and white while I was out and about during lunch. I figured my chances of getting stabbed were reduced while I was with the 8 month pregnant white lady. It worked.
One day, Nancy (I'll call her Nancy for now) and I were headed out, and she was having a crazy pregnant craving for some McDonalds. Now, here I will have to interject about McDonalds in Long Beach. There are quite a few of them. Some are in really ghetto areas, but cook the food well. Others are in nicer areas, but will leave you bleeding out of your anus on a bad day. Depending on what time of the day it was, usually determined which one you were brave enough to venture to. On this day, we ventured downtown. Against my better judgement, of course. But it is fairly hazardous to ones health to argue with a pregnant woman's cravings. On this day, Nancy also wanted to eat inside. The following is a true story of what followed.
I was enjoying some tasty chicken McNuggets, and Nancy was enjoying some McRibs. Just to the side of us was an African American gentleman wearing a fairly nice suit. He was sitting alone, and quietly tending to his meal as well. The restaurant was near capacity. I had this nervous habit of looking at the door every time it opened, since it had a bell or a beep as people entered. I liked to know who was coming in. Nothing could have prepared me for what happened next.
I noticed this tall, lean, and unusually muscular woman walking in holding a 32 oz. gas station cup. She had longer braids, but was walking funny. I looked closer, because something just didn't seem right about this lady. That was when I realized that this was not a lady. This was a dude. It was also pretty obvious that this he-she was high. "It" walked up to the drink station and started to fill up it's fountain drink. Before filling the cup though, a McDonalds employee had walked up and apparently shut off the refill station. The Trani started yelling something at the employee, in an obvious man voice, which make me chuckle to myself. This is when Nancy finally saw what was going on, but we continued to eat our food and pretend nothing was going on. Apparently, so did all the other customers. Right after telling off the McDonalds employee, the Trani turned around and looked briefly at everyone eating in the lobby. He-She strutted up and took a seat directly across from the gentleman in the suit.
TRANI: "Hey, wanna get a room?"
MAN IN SUIT: Continues eating his food and ignores Trani.
TRANI: "Come on man, lemme hook you up.."
MAN IN SUIT: "How bout you f$ck off..."
TRANI: (mumbles some incoherent crack talk under it's breath)
MAN IN SUIT: Picks up a french fry and continues to eat.
TRANI: (mumbles something under it's breath, but I catch something about "getting some crack")
MAN IN SUIT: "Fool, I don't do that shit.."
TRANI: Throws drink in the Man in the Suit's face, then stands up and says, "Nigga, I know you smoke crack! I smoked it wit chu!" Then struts out of the lobby and starts walking down the street.
No one in the lobby reacts in any way. They all continue to eat as if nothing happened. A few people kind of snickered, but that was it. Nancy and I immediately get up to throw away our food, and exit, trying not to laugh. Once we get in the car, we are both in tears with laughter, and I'm sure a little bit of shock at what had just occurred.
Personally, I was just glad that I didn't get stabbed.
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