There was a particularly odd fellow that worked the night crew. He was......well he was kind of special. Luckily, I don't remember his name, so we'll just call him Stuart. Now the thing about Stuart, is that he was a really little guy. If you didn't know better, you'd swear that he was a dwarf, but he wasn't quite there. He wasn't quite there in more ways than one. He had dark hair, was kind of portly, had really thick glasses that made his eyeballs look huge, and he had really stubby fingers. For some reason, his stubby little fingers always caught my attention, probably because he swung his arms in a quick, straight, jerking motion as he walked. I'll probably go to hell for laughing as I'm writing this story, but....I can't help it.
So Stuart had a special job at the tool store, and that was basically walking around and sweeping the store and the warehouse. He always had a lot to say, and was really animated about his stories every night. He really was quite entertaining. One day, we realized Stuart wasn't there, and the next night he came in wearing this odd cast and walked with a short and stubby little limp. Being a concerned manager, I asked him what had happened to his foot. This is what he told me.
"Seems that I caught me a nasty little infection on my foot. My foot was itching real bad, and had a bit of a rash, so I went to the Doctor to get it checked out. Turns out that I got it from my shower."
I was a little confused, so I asked him, "Do you have a fungus or something in your shower?"
This is where he explained that sometimes, when he is showering, and he has to go, he just does. Only he wasn't talking about the occasional tinkle. He was talking Numero Dos. The big number two. He would just take a dump, and then stomp it down the drain with his foot. Turns out that isn't the best idea, as he got some crazy infection in his foot from it. Who would have imagined that?
I was horrified. True story.
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