Gonna be a long night.

I've said it before but I'll say it again.  I'm in a weird place.

I am not into clubbing, and I'm not in my 20's anymore.  I am, however, perfectly content with staying at home and spending quality time with my Daughter.  I also thoroughly enjoy taking her to do fun things that seem to make a 4-year old happy.  Because let's face it, when you're a parent, making your kids happy becomes your mission in life, and therefor makes us happy in return. 

So what happens when you're divorced and have those stretches of time between visitations with your children?  Do you go out?  What do you do?  It's awkward when nearly all of your friends are still married, because who wants to be the 3rd wheel?  Anyone in my shoes will also understand that the same guy friends you used to hang out with occasionally that are married, will suddenly not be available to hang out as much or ever once you become single again.  Apparently now you have become a threat and your "single-loving" ways may rub off on said friend. 

I don't know if I even want to meet new people.  I'm not sure that I really want to get back "out there" and start dating all over again.  Dating kinda sucks.  The thought of being set up makes me queasy.  How many decent girls are out there that are my age?  Ones that I may actually be interested in, that is.  The only people I really see or interact with too much are my co-workers.  I hear it's best to avoid dating your co-workers.  I don't enjoy going to clubs.  In fact, I'm pretty repulsed by it.  Anytime I have gone, I feel like I need a full blown decontamination afterwards.  Not what I'm looking for. 

Let's face it, I am looking for something a little more long term these days.  Sure, a little fun would be nice, but I feel like I deserve better than that, and so does she.  I can't imagine a serious relationship developing with a girl I've met at a club or a bar.  So the question then becomes, where do you go to meet someone?  I'm not going to the gym to meet girls.  I'm also not going to church to meet girls.  Perhaps that's the problem.  Perhaps it's not.  Let's be realistic.

I enjoy having a drink every now and then.  I enjoy spending time with my Daughter.  I enjoy staying home sometimes.  I like hanging out with the same friends I've had for years.  Sometimes, I don't have anything clever to say at all. 

For now I am perfectly content not losing any sleep over it, and will continue doing what I do.  I'll keep hanging out with the same friends and stay in that comfort zone.  I'm open to change and meeting new people, but am not going to try to force anything to happen.  I want that to happen naturally when the time is right.  Here's to another Saturday night alone.  Thanks for the company Jack.